Praying with a Family Mentality

How did Paul pray and how should we pray for each other today?

In addition to how we learn to pray in Eph 1:15-23, let’s gather some more lessons in prayer from Paul. Let’s learn how to better cooperate with God’s work in the church today. More than any elaborate programs and sophisticated strategies, faithful, biblical prayer equips us to experience and expand the glory of God in our generation.

Paul shows us how to pray for one another not necessarily for ourselves. This doesn’t mean we shouldn’t pray this way for ourselves but we should definitely pray this way for one another. Since no member of the church is self-sufficient, our spiritual progress corresponds to our prayers for one another (Eph 6:19-20). We should pray for one another as though we are a spiritual family who mutually relies on one another to succeed, just as spouses and siblings, parents and children rely on each other to live meaningful and successful lives.

Speak to God as the Father of an eternal, global family of which we are a part. (3:14-15)

When Paul prayed, he approached God as a Father (Eph 3:14). By doing this, he simply followed what Christ himself had taught his twelve disciples to pray. He said, “In this manner, therefore, pray, ‘Our Father in heaven’” (Matt 6:9).

Did you know that this is how the NT consistently teaches us to pray? We should pray to the Father as our audience, through Christ as our mediator (1 Tim 2:5), in reliance upon the Spirit (Rom 8:26-27).

Question for Reflection: Do you pray this way consciously, speaking to the Father through Christ in reliance on the Spirit?

Paul took this perspective of praying to God as Father to heart, calling him ‘Father’ seven other times (eight total) in this letter:

• “Grace to you and peace from God our Father” (Eph 1:2) 
• “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ” (Eph 1:3)
• “That … the Father of glory may give you the spirit of wisdom” (Eph 1:17)
• “We both have access by one Spirit to the Father” (Eph 2:18)
• “There is … one God and Father of all” (Eph 4:6)
• “Giving thanks always for all things to God the Father” (Eph 5:20)
• “Peace to the brethren, and love with faith, from God the Father” (Eph 6:23)

Question for Reflection: Do you pray with a genuine appreciation for and awareness of God as your loving heavenly Father or does this feel somewhat distant or mundane?

By speaking to God this way, Paul was not approaching God as a mean and hateful being, like a king who might demand your execution if you come into his courtroom unannounced or if you say something to him in the wrong way.

He also was not approaching God as an abstract, impersonal force. He approached him as a personal, loving being who cares for his people like a father cares for his children. God is a personal being, not an impersonal force, and not a philosophical idea or ideal.

Best of all, Paul was not approaching God as a Father just like any human father. As Jesus taught us, God is far better than even the best human father. He said, “If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!” (Matt 7:11). God intends to hear and respond favorably to our prayers far more than any loving human father ever will.

Question for Reflection: When you pray, do you envision God is eager to hear you and respond to your prayers or do you feel as though he is reluctant instead?

Paul spoke to God knowing God loved him, wanted Paul to come to him in prayer, and intended to answer Paul’s prayer if was asking for good things in line with his will. The things Paul prayed about here were definitely good things that were in line with God’s will!

Remember that the family of God is eternal and spiritual in nature (“in heaven and earth”).

By praying to God as Father, Paul had something else in mind – the family over which and of which God was (is) a Father (“from whom the whole family,” Eph 3:15). He even highlights this with a little wordplay. See if you can hear the p’s, t’s, and r’s and for yourself. Paul says that God is the pater (“father”) of the patria (the “father of the family”).

By saying “whole” family, Paul refers to the inclusion of people from all nations of the world and indicates that it’s a very large family, not a small one. In fact, it’s a multinational, international family. God is not the patron deity or father of one nation only, he’s a Father for people from all nations of the world, for anyone who turns to Christ as God and Savior.

What's more, this family also includes those members who have gone on before us into heaven. These family members not only include those church members who've passed on before us but any believers who followed the Lord by faith from the beginning of time (Heb 12:22).

Though God is sovereign over all people of the world, believers enjoy a special, close relationship with him by which we may speak to him “freely and without fear” because he is our Father (Eph 2:18; 3:12). So, when we speak to God as the Father of our eternal, global family, what are some of the “good things” we should ask from him? We'll answer this question in a subsequent post.

Question for Reflection: When you pray, do you pray for other believers as you would pray for a close blood relative and even more personally or do you pray as though they are a step or more removed?

Question for Reflection: With which believers do you feel most close as a brother or sister and why?

Christ himself felt deeply and taught strongly that his sense of family connection to those who followed him by faith were his close family connections - if not closer (Matt 12:48-50). This sense of a strong family relationship (or "brotherhood," 1 Pet 2:17) originated with Christ and continues to this day. Furthermore, this sense of a strong family relationship with other followers of Christ should drive and motivate our prayers for one another in the church.