Help! There’s No Kids in Our Church (Questions to Ask)

If you’re reading this, you might be experiencing a familiar challenge: your church is struggling to attract or retain young families. Maybe you’ve looked around on a Sunday morning and realized there are no kids in the pews, and the sound of laughter and play is noticeably absent. This can be disheartening, especially when you long to see your church filled with the vibrant energy that children bring. The good news is that this situation can change. By asking the right questions and making thoughtful adjustments, your church can become a place where families feel welcomed, valued, and eager to be a part of the community.

1. Is Your Church a Place Where Families Feel Welcomed and Comfortable?

The first question to consider is whether your church is a welcoming environment for families. This goes beyond a friendly handshake at the door. Families today are looking for a place where they can feel at home, where their children are not just tolerated but celebrated.

Evaluate Your Welcome Process: How are families greeted when they walk through your doors? Do you have greeters who are specifically trained to welcome families with children? It’s important to have people who understand the unique needs of families and who can make them feel comfortable from the moment they arrive.

Create a Warm Environment: Consider the atmosphere of your church. Is it inviting for children? Do you have spaces where families can gather, chat, and let their kids play? A simple change like adding a few child-friendly elements to your foyer or fellowship hall can make a big difference. Comfortable seating, toys, and a designated play area can go a long way in making families feel at ease.

Foster a Culture of Acceptance: Finally, it’s crucial that your congregation as a whole fosters a culture of acceptance toward families with children. This means being patient with noise and movement during services and recognizing that a lively church is a growing church. Encourage your members to welcome families genuinely, showing interest in both parents and children.

2. Is Your Church Ready When Kids Come?

It’s one thing to want more children in your church, but it’s another to be truly prepared for them. If a family with young children walked in next Sunday, would your church be ready to meet their needs?

Children’s Ministry Preparation: Take a close look at your children’s ministry. Do you have programs in place that are ready to go, even if only one child shows up? It’s important to invest in a solid children’s ministry infrastructure, even if you don’t have many kids right now. This might include having volunteers who are background-checked and trained, age-appropriate curriculum, and a plan for welcoming new children into the group.

Safety First: Safety is a top priority for parents. Make sure your church has clear policies in place for the safety of children. This includes everything from secure check-in/check-out procedures to having child-safe facilities. Parents need to know that their children are in a safe environment where they will be cared for and protected.

Flexible Programming: Be flexible and creative with your programming. If you don’t have many kids, consider combining age groups or offering multi-age activities. The key is to be prepared and adaptable, so that no matter who shows up, you’re ready to provide a meaningful experience for them.

3. Is Your Church Ready to Minister to the Needs of Parents?

Reaching families isn’t just about the kids; it’s also about ministering to parents. Parents are often the decision-makers when it comes to church attendance, and if they feel cared for and supported, they’re more likely to bring their children.

Parent-Focused Ministries: Consider offering ministries specifically for parents. This could include parenting classes, small groups for young parents, or even offering free childcare during church events so that parents can participate fully. By providing resources and support tailored to the challenges parents face, you show that your church is invested in their well-being.

Emotional and Spiritual Support: Parenting is challenging, and parents need a community where they can be honest about their struggles and receive encouragement. Offer spaces where parents can share their experiences, pray together, and find spiritual guidance. A church that cares for the hearts of parents will naturally attract families.

Work-Life Balance: Understand the pressures that modern parents face, from balancing work and family life to managing their children’s extracurricular activities. Show that you respect their time by offering flexible service times, online resources, and events that fit into their busy schedules. When parents feel that their needs and time are valued, they are more likely to engage with your church community.

4. Do Your Facilities Appear Welcoming and Appealing to Parents?

The physical appearance of your church can have a significant impact on whether families feel welcome. A church that is clean, safe, and visually appealing sends a message that families—and their children—are valued.

Kid-Friendly Spaces: Walk through your church facilities with a parent’s eye. Are there areas that are specifically designed for children? This might include a well-equipped nursery, bright and engaging Sunday school rooms, or even a family room where parents can take younger children during the service. Small touches like colorful murals, child-sized furniture, and plenty of natural light can make a big difference.

Cleanliness and Safety: Ensure that your facilities are clean, well-maintained, and safe. This includes everything from having clean restrooms with changing tables to ensuring that all areas are free from hazards. Regularly check your playground equipment, toys, and classrooms for safety issues. A clean and safe environment is non-negotiable for families with children.

Welcoming Entrances: First impressions matter. Make sure the entrances to your church are welcoming. Clear signage, easy access, and greeters who can assist families with strollers or other needs all contribute to making families feel at home from the moment they arrive.

5. Are There Families in Your Community That You Can Serve Outside of the Church Building?

Sometimes the best way to bring families into your church is to start by serving them outside of it. Look beyond the church walls and ask how your church can be a blessing to families in your community.

Community Outreach: Consider what community events or programs your church could offer that would serve families. This might include hosting a free family movie night, offering parenting workshops, or providing after-school programs. The goal is to meet families where they are and show them that your church cares about their needs, even if they’ve never set foot inside your building.

Partnerships with Local Organizations: Look for opportunities to partner with local schools, community centers, or other organizations that serve families. By working together, you can have a greater impact and demonstrate that your church is invested in the well-being of the community as a whole.

Service Projects: Organize service projects that families can participate in together. This not only meets a need in the community but also allows families to connect with your church in a meaningful way. When families serve together, they build bonds that can lead to deeper relationships with your church.

6. How Are You Meeting Families in Your Community?

To reach families, you need to go where they are. This might mean stepping outside your church’s comfort zone and finding creative ways to connect with families in your community.

Engage in Community Events: Participate in local community events like fairs, parades, or school functions. Set up a booth, hand out flyers, and engage with families in a friendly, non-intrusive way. The goal is to let families know that your church exists and that you care about their community.

Use Social Media: Today’s families are often found online, so make sure your church has a strong presence on social media. Share photos, upcoming events, parenting tips, and more on platforms like Facebook, Instagram, and even local community forums. Social media can be a powerful tool to connect with families who might not otherwise know about your church.

Personal Invitations: Encourage your church members to personally invite families to church events. A personal invitation from a trusted friend or neighbor can be incredibly powerful. Equip your congregation with tools like invitation cards or social media posts they can share to make inviting others easier.

7. What Are the Felt Needs of Families in Your Community That Your Church Is Equipped to Address?

Finally, it’s important to ask what specific needs families in your community have that your church can help meet. Understanding and addressing these needs can be a key way to attract families to your church.

Community Assessment: Take time to assess the needs of families in your area. This could involve surveys, conversations with local leaders, or simply talking to families in your church. What are the common challenges they face? What resources are they lacking? By understanding these needs, you can tailor your ministry to meet them.

Targeted Programs: Once you’ve identified the needs, consider what programs or services your church could offer to address them. For example, if many families in your community struggle with childcare, consider offering a parents’ night out. If there’s a need for financial literacy, offer workshops that can help parents manage their finances better. The key is to offer something that directly speaks to the felt needs of the families you want to reach.

Holistic Ministry: Remember that families have both physical and spiritual needs. A holistic approach to ministry that addresses both can be incredibly effective. This might mean offering practical resources alongside spiritual guidance, such as a food pantry paired with a parenting Bible study. By showing that your church cares about the whole person—body, mind, and spirit—you can create a ministry that resonates deeply with families.

Conclusion: Hope for the Future

If your church currently lacks children, it’s easy to feel discouraged. But by asking these key questions and making intentional changes, your church can become a place where families feel welcomed, valued, and eager to be a part of the community. It won’t happen overnight, but with prayer, perseverance, and a commitment to meeting the needs of families, you can begin to see a transformation.